My Valentine, My Life

Christian Pop Music plays in the background.

Pink feathery pen bounces between pink tongue and pink paper…

Dear Diary,

I want to know my Valentine.

To Know would be happiness for all involved

To be involved is to own the ultimate gift

To own the ultimate gift is to be loved by him

To be loved by him is to be cherished

To be cherished is to be his obsession

To be his obsession is to be his life

To be his life is to belong to him forever

To belong to him means I can't be free

To be free is to take leave of him

To leave him is to brave his anger

To brave his anger is to make him mad

To make him mad will be the death of me

.. . .On second thoughts, I don't want know my Valentine

The Winner Takes It All

Two identical notes lay on the table.

On closer inspection, their differences concealed by distance and dim lighting, is apparent.

The note on the right, wrinkle free reads. . .

Dear Mom

It had to be done.

Don't miss me.

I love you

Jack.

The I in miss dotted with a smiley.

The note on the left, barely legible. . .angry slashes the Psychiatrist would later say, reads...

Dear Jill

I go to prepare a place in hell for you.

I hope the manner by which you get there is slow and painful.

It's the least you deserve for what you did to me.

See ya soon.

Love Jack

PS

I had the last word. I win.

Mama's Lessons: Dinner Date

Sitting at the table facing him, I couldn’t help but think about how we had gotten here. . .an incredible journey, some would say, a long and arduous road others will counter but what mattered was this - At long last, I got my wish! He was here with me and he’ll never leave.

“More Wine? I ask softly but no response. I didn’t need one because I knew. “Anticipate your guest’s needs” Mama’s lessons came to mind and so I poured. God! I wish he wouldn’t slouch in his chair but I guess it can’t be helped. . . a lifeless body will do that to ya.

Mama's Lesson: A Bath

I hate being wet. I hate the slow drops of water dripping down my body like a snake slithering down a tree. I hate the musky smell that comes from soap and water. I step into the bathroom, the tiles cold under my feet.


A shuddering breath later, I ask myself “Is this really necessary?” but mama’s strident voice echoes in my ears “Cleanliness is next to Godliness”. Cursing softly under my breath, I step in the tub and watch in amazement as the water turns red “Oh well, I guess she is right” I concede as I wash His blood off my body.

Mama's Lessons: Crime and Punishment

"What have I done?" knife clatters to the floor. I back away from the scene of my crime.

"If you can't do the time, don't do the crime” Mama’s voice fills the room Cover-up ideas swirl in my head.

My hands! Oh God, my hands. Need to wash it off, a quick dash to the sink but I stop.

As if possessed, I lick the red liquid mess on my fingers. . .not a bad taste.

Back to the dining table, I dip my fingers in the gape the knife had made, scoop more and in my mouth it goes.

Slurping sounds fill the air. Insanity! No doubt but I didn't care. Do the crime, enjoy the crime, do time.

An Extra hour at the gym? Well worth it, I thought enjoying the cake with rich gooey red frostings.